Ahh...the 4 Year Old.

Well, its been going on for a long time....our 4yo is anti-poop. Ever since we started potty training, he just refuses to poop. After painful constipation, medication, diet changes, positive reinforcement, punishment...still doesn't like to poop, especially not in the toilet. He's 4 1/2 yos...he has been peeing in the toilet for 2 years and doesn't wear anything at night. But where he used to just hold it in for days and then sit all day on the potty...now he just poops in his pants. I hate it. Besides it is absolutely gross....I just don't know what to do.

Yesterday, after a long and angry tantrum by all involved...he eventually cleaned himself, his clothes, and the bathroom up. Only to do it again later in the day...more crying and then cleaning up. So, I guess I plan to try to calming insist that if he is going to poop in his pants that he has to clean it up... Any suggestions?

*Note that the 2yo is fully potty training during the day (he can do the whole thing completely on his own and in 'privacy please').

And we are in the 'hard of hearing' stage of childhood. I remember my oldest in this phase as well but it is still equally annoying. Basically, whatever I say to my 4yo I must repeat at least 3 times (He says 'what?' before I even finish the sentence). I could say anything those first 2 times....he will ask for it be repeated. Another mom at school says hers is doing the same thing. Could it be a conspiracy?

Our middle child really challenges us and he has changed a lot of my parenting tactics for good and, sometimes, bad. He even has impacted my decision to go back to work (I turned down a job last fall because I knew I wouldn't have the energy). Some kids are just more work than others but it is all good work...at the end of the day with a piece of dark chocolate and a glass of wine.